Today we are going to talk about something very important and something that affects couples all over the world and leads them to feelings of inadequacy and feelings of shame.
It is something that is levied upon individuals by society and it is something that is actually dangerous to physical as well as mental health and sexual well-being as today we are going to talk about orgasmic imperative.
WHAT IS ORGASMIC IMPERATIVE?
Orgasmic imperative is not something good and it is something that can ruin the entire experience of having sex because orgasmic imperative is simply sexual pressure.
This is the pressure of sexual expectations as well as performance anxiety as this imperative is the idea that every sexual activity should end in orgasm.
This leads people into thinking that they have to perform exceptionally well and that they are only successful if the sex ends with an orgasm.
It is the idea of sex being a competition and that is something bad. It is the idea that you must be able to win it rather than it being an experience.
Sex is a journey and you must treat it like that because if you are going to think about the destination or orgasm then you are simply not going to enjoy the journey of pleasure.
There are several reasons why it is important to highlight orgasmic imperative because it is actually the difference between pleasure vs. pressure.
Orgasmic imperative is a very limiting idea and it can limit the pleasure that you can have because you are never going to enjoy the present moment and you are always going to think about the orgasm rather than present pleasure or even mutual pleasure.
Sometimes people equate this to toxic masculinity but we are not going to talk about that or even female empowerment because we are simply going to talk about the dangers of orgasmic imperative.
So, here are the dangers of orgasmic imperative.
DANGERS OF ORGASMIC IMPERATIVE
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PRESSURE TO PERFORM
One of the biggest dangers of the orgasmic imperative is that you are always going to be forced to perform well.
When you pay attention to this imperative you stop thinking about having fun and having a good time with your partner and you think of it like a goal or objective.
A goal or objective is good in the office where you need to perform and it is good for studies but it is not good when you are having sex because sex is not an objective.
It is a very intimate moment with two people who love each other and are spending a passionate time together.
However, people forget that when they think about the orgasmic imperative which forces them to think of it like a competition which they have to win.
And if they are not able to reach an orgasm then it can lead to depression because erectile dysfunction or premature ejaculation are actually nothing to be ashamed of because sex is not a competition.
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NARROW DEFINITION OF SEX
Sex should not have any definition because it is different for different people and the moment you start defining sex is the moment you start attaching different rules and regulations and norms.
That is exactly what orgasmic imperative does and it attaches a very narrow definition of sex.
This narrow definition is simply that sex should only be for the achievement of orgasm and that sex should only end in orgasm and the entire focus of sex should be towards experiencing orgasm.
People do not always reach orgasm and people do not have sex for the intention of orgasm because orgasm is an effect of sex and it is not sex itself.
Different people with different disabilities might not even reach orgasm and this narrow view of sex or orgasmic imperative will make them feel ashamed of their situation because they are not able to perform as the imperative implies.
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BAD FOR RELATIONSHIPS
One of the worst effects of the orgasmic imperative is that it is very bad for relationships as it changes the definition of physical intimacy.
If people think about orgasmic imperative then they are not going to see their partners as a companion but they are going to see their partners as a mere means of achieving orgasm.
The moment you start thinking of your partner as a tool for orgasm is the moment you start objectifying your partner just as something that will help you reach orgasm.
That is also the moment when you stop thinking about the pleasure of your partner and you only think about reaching orgasm yourself.
This is why it is so bad to have this imperative because love dictates that we understand the needs and desires and satisfaction of our partner but this imperative totally destroys this notion.
Orgasmic imperative encourages people to only think about themselves and that is a very bad thing for people who are in a relationship.
And if the people who are in a relationship and not able to perform well then it can even lead to the ending of the relationship.
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SHAME AND DEPRESSION
Sex is not about reaching an orgasm and sex is not about anything that anyone tells you because sex is something very personal and it is what you want it to be.
But orgasmic imperative implies that sex should only end in an orgasm because if it does not then you should be ashamed of yourself that you are not able to perform well.
Now think of the situations people face who have sexual disabilities such as erectile dysfunction or even premature ejaculation or perhaps some other kind of sexual disability.
Orgasmic imperative will always make them feel inadequate and will make them feel that they are a disappointment to their partner and that it is shameful that they are not able to reach an orgasm.
This is devastating and can lead to a lack of self-esteem and can even make people get into depression because they will not be able to enjoy the moment with their partner but will be thinking if they can perform well.
We hope this blog has been helpful for you to understand the entire situation of orgasmic imperative and what kind of dangers it can pose.
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